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Your first time having lesbian sex , or girl-on-girl slash vulva-on-vulva sex, can be pretty nerve racking and daunting. No matter how confident you are, or how much lesbian porn you've watched which FYI, is not realistic AT ALL all vaginas are different and like to stimulated in different ways. So if you're in need of some tips on how to have sex with a girl or vulva-having person, here's what you need to know - from how to beat the nerves, to which lesbian sex positions to try.
I know you're thinking,"How on earth will I know what to do? If you've had male or penis-having sexual partners before, that may help inform a fair bit of what you do, but it still might feel strange to be giving what you have previously received.
The good news is that although tips and tricks are handy, sex is still largely intuitive whatever genders or bodies it's between. You might find you surprise yourself Your virgin voyage to the Sapphic Isles needn't come without a personalised map — or, you know, a super-hot Sat Nav with the voice of Marilyn Monroe, if you're lucky.
You don't have to arrange a pre-coital business meeting with pointing sticks and blow-up dolls, but once you've brushed up on some basic lesbian sex tips , simply talking dirty prior to the act is a great way to establish what you both do, and don't want to try with each other. During the act? Never be afraid to say you've changed your mind about something — and always listen carefully to what they say, too.
Trusting your instincts, and each other, is a crucial part of enjoyable sex. There's no better way to get some practice in than masturbation. If you're a regular wanker, great. If not, perhaps now is the time to learn how to masturbate like a pro, to give you some pointers.
Don't freak out if it doesn't work for you — solo sex isn't for everyone. People's vulvas vary in appearance so don't be shocked if your partner's doesn't look much like yours at all but delve a little deeper and you'll find the important bits are generally in a similar area. I will never forget the first time I had a pair of boobs that weren't my own to play with.
My mind went totally blank and I sort of flapped my hands excitedly at them. It wasn't my best sexual performance, to say the least.
Some people don't like having their breasts touched at all. If that's you or your partner, that's cool. Cup them delicately, trace them lightly with your fingers, kiss them softly Try not to grab. If all is going well, then try licking their nipples, using circular movements interspersed with sucking not too hard.
Don't be put off if you have to go through a bit of trial and error with a new partner. Ready to go in? Start with one finger and build up — shoving four in at once, unless specifically asked to, is bad form. You also need to make sure you keep an eye on what your other digits are doing — thumbs digging into thighs spoil the mood.
Build speed up slowly. G-spot stimulation sends some people wild, others are indifferent, and still others actively dislike the sensation of having it touched. It's easier for some than it is for others to find it, so persevere. Wiggle your finger s on it and see what happens If you'd rather use a G-spot vibrator to stimulate them and clitoris at the same time if you're feeling really generous ,.
It's also the hardest aspect of girl-on-girl and vulva-on-vulva sex to give clear, one-size-fits-all advice on — sorry! Again, starting slowly is a good plan.
Gently part their outer labia and lick up from the vaginal entrance to the clitoris this has the added benefit of giving you chance to find the clit if you are having trouble — some people wear 'em buried deep! Lick up and down the labia themselves. Focus on the clit and licking around it, using your wonderful friend Ms Circular Motion.
Vary the pressure. Inserting a finger if they're OK with that! Trial and error, trial and error. Remember it is still possible to catch STIs from same-sex sex. For safer oral sex, little squares of latex called dental dams can be placed over your genitals. Handy hint: a slit open condom works just as well.
For responsible fingering, grab yourself some latex gloves. You can get some awesome flavoured dental dams which taste great while keeping you protected, these strawberry dental dams are great. Other kit? Well that's for discussion between the two of you. Personally I'd advise keeping this for later — things will be nerve wracking enough as it is if you've never slept with a woman or same-sex partner before. As ever, remember that some people don't like being penetrated — never assume anything.
Once you're comfortable and feel like you want to try different positions, there are many vulva-to-vulva positions to go through. Including the rather infamous scissoring , if that's your bag. Watch the below video for a run down of some awesome girl-on-girl sex positions. As you are no doubt aware, women and vagina-havers generally take longer than those with penises to orgasm, and some find it hard to manage at all.
So don't despair if you've already come and they're still nowhere near the finish line, or vice versa. Try these next-level oral sex positions. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories.
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The beauty advent calendars to buy now. Best midi dress options to shop. Adene Sanchez Getty Images. Use your intuition I know you're thinking,"How on earth will I know what to do? Focus on the clitoris and always ask before inserting a finger or penetrating someone Andrii Zastrozhnov Getty Images. Mantric Rechargeable G-Spot Vibrator. Mantric lovehoney.
First time lesbian sex can be daunting, but as long as you communicate you will be fine Adene Sanchez Getty Images. Related Story. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. Why Queer Eye's Antoni doesn't identify as gay. What not to do when eating someone out. Miley defends "you don't have to be gay" comments. Abortion and same-sex marriage legalised in NI. Photos from this Queer Prom will give you feels.
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Skip navigation! Story from Sex. Sex between two women is a beautiful thing. Unfortunately, there's a lot of misinformation out there. So when two people with vulvas are having sex, I think a lot of folks don't understand how that works since there's no penis. They may think that women can't have sex or that the sex isn't satisfying," says Liz Powell , an LGBTQ-friendly sex educator, coach, and licensed psychologist.
To clarify some misconceptions — and, of course, to give women who have sex with other women some hot ideas — I rounded up a list of fun sex position suggestions. FYI: These aren't just for lesbians! They can be enjoyed by queer women, bisexual women, pansexual women, or even straight-identifying women looking to explore.
I identify as queer, I've had sex with both men and women, and I'm also attracted to non-binary people. Since sex between two women is often so fetishised through the male gaze, I made sure to only include positions I've tried and enjoyed or which others I've spoken with have tried and enjoyed. And I kept the sex position names to the point because I'm trying to help you, not confuse you. You're welcome!
Yet this is indeed a roundup of steamy sex positions, so a few might be a little out there — but trust me, they're worth the sore back the next day. Another important note: While the article often refers to "women", it's crucial to remember that some women have penises and some vulva-havers the term the brilliant Dr.
Liz often uses in her quotes are men. Read on and enjoy — and check back, because we'll be adding new positions regularly. From ghosting to breadcrumbing to benching, sometimes it feels like we need an entire dictionary of words describing annoying dating behaviours.
Well, some. A twinge on your vulva. No, not a twinge — an itch. The levels of violence against women and girls in the UK at its highest level in five years. Flo Perry is a writer and illustrator who has made a career out of her passion for drawing breasts and penchant for quizzing people about their sex lives a. There are plenty of articles on the internet telling men how to make a woman come in five minutes, 10, or But what if a woman wants to make herself com. Some come easily, while others might go their whole lives without one.